It’s time for The Spittoon’s weekly caption competition again. This week, because of the publication of a new report on HT’s activities, we’d love you to work your witty captions onto an image of those delightful religious supremacists from the fringe group, Hizbut Tahrir: Imran Waheed (back, right) and Taji Mustafa (back, left).
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Imran Waheed thinks: Uurrgh. Maybe I shouldn’t have had that 14th kebab roll.
White guy at front of picture: Man, I’m stoned. Time to roll another one.
Imran: I can tell from your eyes. What’s that you are making?
White guy (rolling intently): it’s called a Hizbi Carrot.
Taji: Eh?
White guy: because it looks like a carrot and I’m making it for the Hizbi.
{Fade out, all giggling inanely]
Imran – Do you think the Caliph will create a special ministry for me called the Ministry of Food
Fombo – Come on Imran, lets work on securing more government funds first
Taji: Hey Imran. You’ve got more fanmail.
Imran: Al-Hamdulillah. What does it say?
Taji: It’s bad news bruv. This one guy says you look like Shiraz Maher.
Imran: Fuck. You mean my diet hasn’t worked?
Taji: I’m afraid so. The brothers did warn you that Slimfast was controlled by Zionist stooges…
Imran: A’uzu bil Allah min al shaitan al rajeem. When the Khilafa happens we shall have have to ban these pro-Zionist dieting fads. Write that down Fombo! Remind me again when I am Caliph!
Taji: Yes Massa!
Makarios-Is-My-Bitch:
Interesting name. What does that make Denktash?
Imran looks like he’s about to take a dump in Taji’s living room!
Back at Hizb HQ, the drones were completely oblivious of the fact that Imran Waheed was, in fact, undercover agent Shiraz Maher.
imran waheed: so what you’re saying, bro, is that using this mug marked “top bloke / cool dude”, compared to your inferior blue mugs with yellow rings on, marks me out as a contender for the caliphate?
b’shalom
bananabrain
Taji Mustapha was finding it more and more difficult disguising his increased levels of mug-envy when amongst his Hizb colleagues.
TAJI: So, what does this word mean?
IMRAN: Search me, it’s in Arabic, innit.